and I wish I could be someone else. (Zero's POV)

he feels beautiful.

he twirls in the mirror, shoes too big; he is so small for his age, and delicate.

like his mother, those honey-brown eyes. like his mother, soft black curls fall long and thick around his small-boned face, his soft, pliant mouth, lined in smudged red lipstick. hers.

he smiles, and there are flecks of red on his small, pearl-like teeth. her hat is too big. he takes it off his head and smiles again, mimicking her twirl and twining his little hands in the too-big dress.

the cloth is soft and blue beneath his fingers. he sings along with the radio, pouts at the mirror again; the playful pouting kiss his mother gives him.

he feels big.

another step; he wobbles in the shoes, fingers brushing the mirror before he falls to the ground. it isn't the first time. he sits, startled, feet outspread, poking out of the shoes, and he hears a noise- looks up-

"michael."

looks up, up, up.

fear dissappears.

"momma." he holds his hands out, and she gives a soft laugh, kneeling to her son. so young. different.

she knows he's different. knows how much it disgusts his father- she says he's only a child, and children dress-up. children play make believe.

but no son of his would be tottering around in mother's high heels, no.

michael junior is four years old, and has already been to the hospital with a broken wrist.

his mother has faired worse.

she wants to leave with him, with his older brother. but she is afraid. he is a big man, a powerful man, and sometimes she believes him when he says he'll find her no matter what.

she holds her son, wrapped in her dress, smelling of a little too much... perfume? oh, goodness, almost half the bottle, she realizes with a surprised laugh. poor dear.

"oh, honey." she soothes his hair, and he wraps his fingers in hers. "oh, honey. it's not going to be easy for you."

"i'm pretty?" the little boy asks.

"my honey bear," she coos, pulling him into her lap, and placing the hat on his head, "my honey honey honey bear, you are beautiful, forever and ever."

she hugs him.

he'll be home soon, and they've got cleaning to do.

she has plans to make.